This is as easy as a metaphor. In the olden days, before I was ever pregnant, I went to Crunch, back when it was still a good gym in New York City. I was only interested in the Tai Kickboxing and Yoga. Both were harder than I thought - I had led a pretty sedentary 35 years.

But as I continued to go to one of each class every week, I discovered something:

Yoga made the kickboxing easier.
And kickboxing made the yoga easier!

This was a shocking discovery for me, but I realized that one sport stretched and toned me, while the other built my muscles - and both were needed to perform each of these sports well, only in different measure.

I was thinking about this as a metaphor for my writing. Because I was a better writer when I was a writing poet, as well as I was a more involved poet when I was writing fiction. One built my writing muscles (fiction) and the other stretched me (poetry).

I want to give up everything else I’m doing and do this. Don’t know how that will work, but it’s just what I want.

you keep me crawling,
do you even know that?

you keep me crying.
have you closed the door from one error
or have my crimes multiplied, and i did not know.

my knees bleed from the groveling
you don’t even know i do

and even
as I write these words
what i feel is

how much I miss you
how much I love you
and how in what life
I can ever right this wrong

My beautiful mother, who suffers from Alzheimers, lost her breast today in order to survive cancer. She was the best mom ever, and I miss her because I’m not sure who this lady is. This is for Mom:

SLIPPING

She was my rock
My shelter in storm
The Beauty who led me
to safe solid ground.
She made herself up
Taught me vanity
now she’s falling to pieces before me.
Her hair strings a clip
plastered to her head,
her thoughts all spotty
as the light quietly dies.
I’m jealous
Time robs her
God wants her
I’ll never see her child-grin again.
Never thought she’d go while she’s still here

See it with some graphics at the poetry page by clicking on “Slipping”. (Popups and Javascript required.)